Not A Clue
I don't have any idea why I'm blogging right now... Don't even know what to say. I just found myself here on my lunch break.
Let's see... Worship practice is tonight. That should be interesting... and tense... Also spoke with an InterVarsity guy last night, gonna see if I can get involved there. Don't know how or when, but God's just doing His thing right now. I can't fathom it, in my present circumstances, so I have no choice but to trust Him. I like it best that way. When things are too clear or easy, I start relying on my own strength and understanding... and we all know where that gets Jack. Heh.
I can't help feeling like there's something I should say right now, but I don't know what. It's driving me crazy. Maybe I should just shut up and listen to the Holy Spirit, but then my brain is saying "But you only have a few minutes left, and then you have to go back to work--you don't have TIME to shut up and listen to the Holy Spirit"... and then I go "What?!? Who doesn't have TIME for the Holy Spirit?!? Shut up and listen." So I'm going to shut up.
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Ok, here goes. Don't know who, but:
You need to be still, and listen... really listen. That doesn't mean be still and rationalize in your own mind, or think it over... but LISTEN. He's showing you something and you don't understand it, and it goes against what you're accustomed to, so you're rejecting it without even grasping it. You're not even tossing the idea back, because you haven't caught it yet. Stop applying "common sense", and past experience, and all the things other people have told you, and all that other previous "programming" to the thoughts He's planting in you. Sit down, shut up, and let them take root. This is it--this is God working inside you, changing you from the inside out. Let it happen. He has such plans for you... but you have to let Him work them... and to do that, you must first be still and listen...
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I had to, just to be able to do that. See, now I'm thinking about those dadgum spiritual gifts tests again, and how they freak me out, and I just don't want to think about it. But I know better... God is telling me better, I should say. Even though it scares me, and I would rather just be rational and civilized and not think about it, there's no denying the supernatural. It's so much safer, isn't it? To pretend that it's something totally removed from us? To believe that it exists and is just as real as flesh and bone, but to just not let it take hold in our minds or find a place in our lives? But that's not what God wants. The "supernatural" is just as real as the natural, and there is no denying it. None. Whatsoever. And so to grow in Christ, we must acknowledge how we are gifted through the Holy Spirit... So I'm working on that.
Here's an exercise in openness. Share what your spiritual gifts are. Just leave a comment and tell us what yours are. I'll even go first. No judging. No fear. Just spit it out.
I knew I'd have a high score in Music, and I figured I probably would in Shepharding. I was right on both counts. But what I was not prepared for was the equally high scores I received in Wisdom, Discernment, and Prophecy. Deep down, I think I may have expected the wisdom or discernment, but that's for another day. I don't know. Just kinda scares me...
Ok, your turn. If you don't know what yours are, there are TONS of places online to take a test and get an idea... Just do a yahoo search for spiritual gifts tests. Can't wait to hear from you!
- Jack -
